Learning to love the way I am

It seems that you keep more of the weight you put on with pregnancy with each baby that you have. With Makenna, I only had five pounds extra. I wish that was all I had left with Jordyn and now Aiden. But it is not so. The weight likes to stay put the older you get and I've never lost well while breastfeeding which I usually do for a year!! It's like my body holds onto that fat to make sure I have enough to feed them! It really sucks because it would be so much easier if that helped me to lose weight since I do it for so long! I didn't even start trying to lose with Jordyn until after I stopped nursing her because it seemed to be useless. I finally had it all off right before I got pregnant with Aiden:) Go figure. This is the highest un pregnant weight I've had and I can't fit into anything! It sucks but I'm not as obsessed with it as I was before. It's not healthy to put all my worth into what my weight is. Don't get me wrong. I really want to lose weight. I feel better and I like how my clothes fit when I'm thinner. But I'm not going to put all of my self worth into a number. My husband tells me all the time that I look good and that I'm sexy. I never believe him but I'm going to start. If he thinks I'm beautiful, then who am I to argue with him. :) I am just going to try to work out as much as having a young family allows and try to eat healthier options. But I am also not going to deprive myself of yummy food! I am going to strive to lose weight but I'm not going to let it overtake my life. I am learning to love the way I am no matter what size my body happens to be at the moment.